When You "Don't Have Enough Time"

We can't help but look back a few years ago as we were rebuilding our marriage and think 'what a treasure this new marriage is.' It felt special, valuable, brand new, and we felt it needed to be protected at all costs.

We would often reference Bruno Mars' song 'Treasure' when we would talk about this brand new marriage we were fostering. Its a fun song :)

Before, in our 'old' marriage, we put so many things before our relationship. I (Armando) worked around the clock. Any business trip, speaking engagement, networking gig I could take, I would. I loved the feeling of being seen and appreciated in my workplace. It gave me the validation I wasn't getting at home. My time went to my work.

For me (Liz), I got caught up in the early years pouring over my kids. My time went into making sure they looked like all the other kids and my family looked like the picture-perfect family. Trying to keep up with the Joneses took up so much time. Later I spent time trying to grow a social media following, always turning my attention to making content and gaining followers. I tended more to strangers on social media than I did to my family. I liked the attention and got carried away in it.

Anytime we went on a date it was with other friends or couples. We never really went out solo. We poured time into building friendships and looking the part.

In the process, our marriage was failing. It was hanging on by a thread and then BOOM it came crashing down one day.

Because we decided to stay the course and allow God to heal and rebuild our marriage, we had to BE VERY INTENTIONAL about nurturing and fostering this new marriage. Life scaled back and all that mattered was God, US, and our kids.

We learned that TIME is a treasure. Where was our time going? Where our time was going was a clear indicator of where our treasure was hidden.

Matthew 6:21 

'Your heart will always be where your treasure is.'

Take a moment and read the scripture again. Now reread it as “Your heart will always be where your TIME is.

We want to encourage you to not allow your marriage to fall victim to 'NOT HAVING ENOUGH TIME.'

Life for us has been stressful and busy lately. We are growing this ministry as well as building other businesses. Our daughter is in tennis 4-5 days a week. We volunteer at our church. Our son is in the middle of launching into adulthood. There's plenty going on so in this season if we can't get a date night we settle for a date 'coffee,' date 'errand,' date 'lunch.' Time has become a NON-NEGOTIABLE for us. When things get busy we look at the calendar and always make it a priority to PUT US ON IT.

Time is a gift that we can steward. Time is something to be treasured. Time is a valuable tool that you have to love on, nurture, and invest in your spouse.

Some of the common excuses we have heard are:

- We have no time.

- Little Johnny has practice 4 days a week.

- I work too much.

- We are too tired.

- We don't have money to go out.

- It's awkward spending alone time together.

- I'm too distracted.

- I'm Too busy.

REMEMBER…Spending intentional time together builds bonds, brings you closer, and helps your spouse see that they are #1 in your life. Theres no better gift than the gift of your time for your spouse and really theres no excuse for not spending time together.

ACTION STEP: Take a moment and answer these questions…

- Where is your time going?

- Who is your time going to?

- How can you make time for one another this week/month?

Be encouraged,

Armando and Liz